We're going to eat deep fried pork rinds that are supposed to taste like bacon.
Now let me tell you for one thing, I started eating these and they tasted like shit and each one that I eat tastes better than the previous one.
The ingredients are pork, lard, and salt.
They're super decent.
It doesn't really have much of a smell; it's very neutral smelling... uh...
Okay, I said this to Mel earlier. There's an episode of Trailer Park Boys where Ricky is cooking bacon and Bubbles comes up to him and he's like super hungry. Ricky's like 'here have this heel of bread that's really stale and dip it in the bacon fat'. Bubbles eats it and is like 'this is fucking foul,' that's what these tasted like the first time I put them in my mouth.
They still taste that way.
But it keeps on getting worse.
Yeah, they're really bad. I mean it tastes like stale old dirty bacon fat.
They have like the texture, at first, of rice cakes... but ones that have just been soaked in grease.
They're like the cheesesies at the bottom of the bag that are greasy but really salty.
But you left the bag open for a couple days.
No, those are delicious.
Oh, oh, I've crossed the border now. They tasted shitty, and then good, and then great, and then awesome, but now I'm going back the other side where there's just so much salt and it tastes so much like shit, but I'm going to keep eating them.
These are so bad, and I'm not going to eat anymore, and I'm going to feed these little two pieces to the dog who likes them, probably because he eats dog food and dog food is disgusting.
We gave some to him earlier and he ate it, so we know Heineken will eat it enthusiastically.
Will the little dog eat it?
He's not supposed to... His mom is a vegan.
Well what if we just gave him a little?
Here, just give him that little...
Robyn, I'm sorry.
The dog without teeth likes it.
Overall I'd say it's pretty terrible.
I have to defend it to a point, though. Of all the bacon things that we've had, this probably tastes the most like bacon.
Hmmm, I'm not saying it tastes like bacon.
It has the elements - it has the pork and the fat and the salt.
It is actual pork, though. It's not like they took something that is not pork-related and made it taste like bacon - that has yet to be seen.
I'm just giving some credit where credit is due.
Yeah, so saying that fucking pork tastes like bacon... that's not a feat
These were made in Calgary. I just want to let you know what's going on in Alberta. They are using around 10 barrels of water to extract 1 barrel of shitty...
I was going to say 'dirt oil' but yes, pork rind. And they've turned it into this stuff.
Guys, can't we just have one bacon episode that's not political?
How can you not get political about this? This is disgusting, Cheryl. It's stuck in my teeth now.
What was your impression before you ate it?
It smelled like shit. It looked like puffy shit.
I was the one who poured it into the bowl and I was immediately disgusted by it, and I do a lot of disgusting things.
Mostly to her... and, so, that's saying something. I knew as soon as I poured it out that this was going to be bad.
How did it smell?
It smelled kind of neutral to me.
Okay wait, it smells like the back of a chinese food restaurant.
Oh my god, it does!
Yeah, it smells like a deep fryer, and it smells a lot better than it tastes, and I think that's the first time I've ever said that about a bacon product.
It actually doesn't smell like shoe polish for once.
Well, we already covered the 'how it tastes' so I think we're good on that. For Cheryl it's a rolling scale where it was up to good, but now...
I mean I would eat another piece, but it tastes so bad.
It kinda looks like packing peanuts.
We could use this as packing peanuts.
Yeah, it's got a pretty good break rate.
You know, I have to send some stuff up to an iron mine in northern Labrador, and it's really fragile... I think I may use this to pack it in.
Well I think we've covered the... whatever the fuck they were called. Bacon Puffs?
BACK-N-Puffs. It wasn't even bacon, it was BAC apostrophe N. For you connoisseurs out there it means 'not actually bacon'.